duskq
glass, or water, or crystal. just anywhere you can see yourself yet not so clearly
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all day it was like this core thought in the back of my mind, sometimes surfacing but i was able to just look at it and learn something. i was thinking about the idea of how accusations or insults or complaints (judgments) in any form come from that source- your self- meaning they become a major fear because you know them well> you've done them yourself or at least contemplated the notion. then it led me to issues of self-esteem.. physical in particular.. and if we practice just looking at things, others, for their cores/true selves, then something very unifying comes up.. and not only that but an illumination.. how our obsessive thoughts- negative- harsh- all come from not ourselves but obviously the outside world.. and our ability to reach a very low point therefore bringing us to view the world and others thru that low, unevolved and primal, sensory place in us. well of course this is a plain fact that is 'understood'- stands as a given- but i am finding out where it all comes from, _feeling_ where it comes from.. where the pain really is (or is transferred to/from).. we do not want to do this to ourselves. i know this is simple fact, as dry as people make it.. but these thoughts helped me objectify my abyss, helped me closer to being able to look at it all, and hopefully practice this enough to transform my abyss.  |
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